The Rebel Faction

"I claim this land in the name of Azguardia and whatever loser-country we may be affiliated with!"

"What are you talking about? You can't just claim this land for Azguardia-"

"Yeah, you fool! Claim it for ourselves! Our own planet! think of the glory!"

"No, I mean there are already people here-"

"Good, the Coalition has some stringent squatters laws that should help make some money of them."

"I like pie."

It was a scene common to every planet across the galaxy. Brave explorers and diplomats seeking out peoples they had never encountered before, to extend the olive branch of friendship and rally the natives to a common and heroic cause. And the people, bold representatives of their race, would help bring the travlers home safely, so that others might hear of their enlightenment.

It wasn't very common here.

What was common around here was four rather loud-mouthed scientists/substitute explorers fighting over a flag (and the last slice of pie) and occasionaly bumping into their Volt-wagner class inter-planetary transport ship.

Another common thing was gawping crowds. Nothing draws attraction like a bunch of aliens switching from claiming your land and arguing over who's had too much pie.

Yes, TARGET had comissioned... commishioned... comie... sent a team of four explorers to Cerea, but when they didn't return, they decided it wasn't worth risking any more lives to try and find out what happened. So instead they voted wether Azguards' four chief idiots counted as dead or alive, and then sent them on their way.

The people of Cerea were still oblivious to most of that. The Azguads were busy bickering. Let's watch.

The leader came to speak to them.

"I see you have come to Cerea. That must have taken some time. But I hope you do not mind if I catch a play before I hear you out - it isn't urgent, is it? - good, in that case, come this way, eh?"

Perplexed, they moved to the edge of the ice, sat down with him, and watched while they brought out scenery and placed it upon the ice. Finally, two men on skates heaved a banner above the scene.

It said West-side Star Destroyer.

"What's going on?" Whispered Yiffin.

"Shush!" hissed Frelgrin, "the play's starting!"

And so it did.

The scene lifted on a space-station above the planet Tholotia. This was before the war, and evident was two groups of people.

A small boy, dressed in a Coalition uniform, is walking alone. Suddenly, two bigger boys, wearing Imperial uniforms, appear on the scene. They laugh, and hurl bits of fruit at him that they take from a nearby stand. The boy is chased off the set by them, only to reapear on the other side, this time with two bigger still boys, also in Coalition uniforms.

These bigger boys chase the Imps, until they run straight into two more Imps. Now outnumbered, the Coals and the Imps fight. More boys dressed from each side join the fray, until one shouts "Look out! a Guard's coming!"

The guard arrives, but he sees nothing suscpiscious. On the left, a group of youths dressed in Imperial uniforms. On the right, a roughly equal group dressed as Coalition members. They were both snapping, rather rythmically.

"Now, I don't want any troube from you guys, all right? It's a small space station and the last thing we need is Imps and Coals at each other, Ok? If I see any of you crossing the line, you're all getting the boot? Got it?"

He moves on.

The scene fades.

It raises on the Imperials standing in a group, near a fence. One of them, the leader (Jerico), speaks up.

"These Coals, they think they can go wherever they want. They think they're so tough, but we could show them a thing or two, right boys?"

There is a chorus of agreement. One boy, younger then most, steps forwards.

"Then why don't we? Lets' get 'em to rumble, and then we'd show these upstarts whos' the boss."

"Hey" interruped Jerico "These Coals, they're not like the Reps or the Rebels, they fight old-school style, they might go to Vibros, or even blasters."

"But we're not scared"

"I know that, but we still want to have the odds in our favour, don't we?" He smiled. "Why don't we get old Demoes on our side? He and I started this gang, and no one could fight better then Demoes."

"But he quit the gang, Jerico" says one of the taller boys "Who's to say he would want to help us?"

"Oh he will, once an Imperial, always an Imperial, right boys?"

"Right!" They chorused back.

Then they broke into song.

"When you're an Imp
you're an Imp all the way
Though your clothes are from Pimps
and your guns don't shoot straight."

"When you're an Imp
Let them do what they can
You got armies and warfleets
Your an Imperial Man."

"You're never alone
You're never disconnected
Your helmet phone
will be on just as excpected
And in white you are protected"

"Then the universe is yours
With a capital I
No one can take it
till the day we all die."

"When you're an Imp
You stay
an Imp!"

The song ends. Jerico speaks to them again.

"Trust me, with Demoes on our side, we'll cream those Coals and send 'em packing. Make sure you're at the Mess Hall by ten tonight!"

The song begins again

"When you're an Imp
You're the lord of the town
No more alien scum
while we're still around."

"When you're an Imp
You're the best @#%$ thing
Every soldier a lord
Every lord is a king."

The song pauses abruptly, for someone to add "But the Emperor is still the boss, or else you're shot."

"The Imps are prepared
Our trigger finger's itchin'
The Coals will steer clear
'Cause alien freaks are chickens!"

The backdrop changes, suddenly they are parading down the center of the Space station's hall.

"Here come the Imps
like a Tie-fighter's wail
Someone get in a way
They're going to hell
Here come the Imps
little world step aside
our ships will warm up
and waste your lousy hide!"

Sitting in the Audiance, watching the play, but not exactly enjoying it, was Yoimp. Yoimp was a Furen, but perfectly disguised as a Cereian... No one would ever guess that this Innocent-looking Cereian was really an evil spy, who planned to steal the scripts of the play and thereof (yet to be determained HOW) forever ruin the lives of all Cereians... FOREVER. So long as he pretended he was very small... And his fake cone-head didn't give him away... and he concealed his low-pitched voice... and he didnt *accidentally* eat any Cereians... His disguise was perfect, and he could continue on his plans successfully.

Yoimp watched the background of the play change... that was his cue... right? He never did get that part straight. How was he supposed to get the play from the Cereians anyway? No matter, he would think of a way.

Yoimp growled at the music, he didnt like it. But wait, he was supposed to be a Cereian... Did they really like that music? Of course they did... they were, after all, primatic idio- i mean... different.

So, to disguise his dislike of the music, Yoimp Laughed. Wait... no one else was laughing... wasn't this supposed to be funny?

Argh!!! In Frustration, Yoimp stormed out of the room... wait... how would he steal the play if he was gone?

Then it hit him! *BONK*... To get the play, he would need a SCRIPT! and a SCRIPT would be BACKSTAGE! Wasn't he just the smartest little Furen ever? Well, the DUIofF(Direct Underground Intellagence of Furens) wouldent have picked him if he wasn't.

So... to get backstage he would have to go back... behind the stage! wouldent he? Yep he was so smart!

He slowly sneaked down the left isle of the play house. He encountered a door.. He turned arounf and put his basck to the door like a good spy. He glanced to his Right... Wall... He glanced to his left... People. He went through the door.

He walked down an unfinished hallway with door all along it. He read the signs as he went by. " Props" ... no ... "Star Dressing room" ... no .... "Storage" ... no .... "Office" ... no ... "PLACE WITH SCRIPTS" ,,, no ...

Wait, what was that? Yes! That was what he wanted! a SCRIPT! HE enterred the room and looked around. What were all these papers?!

For a few moments Yoimp scratched his head and stared blankly at the peices of paper around him. Just for safety measure, he took one, folded it up until it was higher than it was wide, and put it in his pocket. What on earth were these things? Then he realized something, scripts were paper!!!! So could these be the scripts? He picked up another one and looked at it.

Interesting, there seemed to be 6 strange, bold symbols an the top. The first one was Curvey, like a snake. the second one was the left half of a circle. Then the next one a line upward with a horizantal line crossing it near the top. THen- Wait! Were these LETTERS?! YES! He had found it! he found the script!

As he turned to walk out, he noticed a strange someone in the corner. Furen stared at him blankly, like a cow looks at an oncoming train. The said,

"duh..... who are you?" He seemed to have trouble forming the words, this made him sound like a total idiot... a very accurate portrayal.

The assassin then viciously responded, "Who do you think i am?! fool!"

Uh... He thought that he was a....... a........ he had absalutely no clue. Then he remembered something that Furen High Command had told him, You must capture the Military document, clevery disguised as a script, and return, AT ALL COSTS. Interesting enough, this venture had been absalutely free so far. But the begining of the message had told him that it was a MILITARY uh.... thingy.

"You! You are a...... milAtary oficer" He said, haveing problems with the last two words. He put the emPHAsis on the wrong sylAble, but that didnt mattter... did it?

"and you gunna kill me? den i kill you!"

Simple Furenian logic. Killing was, after all, what they were best at.

Yoimp the furen starred blankly at the assassin as he ran away. With a dumb expression on his face, he then turned to the explorers.

"Aduh... hehe... i won" Said the furen stupidly in his low idiotic voice.

The explorers then looked at eachother, than to the furen, then to eachother, than to the furen.

"What in the blazes are you doing, you dirty little bit of furen filth!" Said the quickest-minded explorer, his eyebrows furrowed in a confused expression.

The furen then suddenly looked sad, tears in his eyes he backed backward and whined, "WAh!!!! he called me little! Wah!!!! i want my mommy!" he then burst out in a fit, fell to the floor and started yelling.

Apparently, the explorer had absentmindedly used the magic insult. "little" must have been the worst thing anyone could call a furen. But wasn't this one slightly over reacting?

Then the furen, still lying on the ground crying his eyes out realized something. The explorer had posed a question! He had actually been asked a question! This implied that he knew something that these people didnt. Which made him smarter than them!

The furen stood up and smiled, showing his rotting and decaying teeth, he strutted up to the explorers.

"And what if i told i have thwarted your primative security and accessed these highly improtant millatary documents? Heh? Oh, dont play dumb, you know what i mean! These 'scripts' contain your millataries deepest secrets, we know where you LIVE!"

Said the furen, using the many big words that he heard the DUI (of F) people using, wasnt he soooooo smart?

The explorers then stared blankly at the Furen, apparently they had insulted and complimented him at the same time? Or probably his stupid mind comprehended hundreds of things that they didnt say... Regardless, this furen seemed to be subject to large moodswings... of some sort.