Trazu had a lot to do and likely not a lot of time to do it, so he needed to start right away.
First off, he needed to gather some training and studying material: he was going to be pulling some late nights getting as much training as he could before they left. To his surprise he found Asri wandering the library, not looking like she was looking for anything in particular but more like she was just curious about what they kept there. He wanted to say something to her, but wasn’t quite sure what to say, let alone if she would be willing to speak to him again so soon after his little…slip up…earlier. Ultimately he decided to give Asri her space.
Retrieving the book he had left behind earlier, he tucked it under his arm and started browsing the shelves. He had picked out a couple more books of interest by the time Asri spotted him.
“A rare thing to see a T’Doshok actually reading literature.” He heard her say suddenly with a faint chuckle. Beside himself he jumped slightly, having not expected for her to talk to him at all.
“Normally I probably wouldn’t even bother with these.” Trazu admitted. “Being a T’Doshok that learned by ‘doing’ and all. But I don’t have much time….”
“You don’t?” Asri asked, puzzled. “Why not? They kicking you out already?”
“Heh…no.” Trazu replied with a smile. "I will be leaving soon on an expedition to the caves I found while I was a Dark Jedi."
“Oooh. Sounds like something your ranger talents will come in handy with. Anything interesting there?”
Trazu chuckled. “Bunch of carvings depicting historical events and a Force imbued sphere.”
“Ok, that sounds out of my league.” Asri said with a giggle. “Even if I did once work for a Sith. Guess I’ll just stay here being bored to death.”
“Well if you want something to do.” Trazu said, an idea coming to him. "Since I don't know how long I will be away and since Maskis lost his partner he'll probably need help keeping an eye on Lavality. Your past experiences have already proven useful in deterring attempts on Lavality's life and I imagine Maskis wouldn't mind your continued help. Unless, that is, you prefer to return to Trandosha, which I can arrange safe passage for you."
"And have to deal with your sister again so soon?" Asri said with more then a little venom in her voice. "I'll stay here thank you, at least until you are ready to return home yourself."
"You are more then capable of handling yourself around her Asri, I've seen that."
"Yeah, but she isn't so...blunt...with her insults when you are around. I'd rather not get mentally bludgeoned to death the moment I step off the transport."
Trazu chuckled. "As you wish." Privately he was glad she'll be sticking around at the Academy. “Oh…could you by chance attempt to get me some sets of clothes before I leave? I’d rather not go on an expedition wearing baggy loaners…”
“I can see what I can do.” Asri said. “That rogue wookiee did mess up my shopping earlier and I could use some spare clothing myself. Anything specific you want?”
“Just normal clothes should be good, although…” He paused to think a moment. “See if you can pick up an outfit that resembles but not exactly the…traditional Jedi attire.”
“Hmm…so you identify with them yet not at the same time?”
“Well I am not going to be training as a full Jedi, so I feel it would be inappropriate do match their look exactly.”
“Understandable. I’ll see what I can do.”
“Did you need any credits? I can transfer…”
“Don’t worry about it.” Asri said with a raised hand. “My dear
father left me with a nice inheritance to spend as I please.”
“That’s right…” Trazu said with a smile. “I had forgotten about that.”
Asri smiled in turn, making it hard for Trazu not to shudder with pleasure at the sight of it. “I’ll hit the bazaar when it first opens, so I should have your clothes by lunch.”
“Don’t you mean dinner?” He said with a smirk.
“Ha ha. Very funny wise guy.” She punched him playfully in the arm.
“Ow! Ok, I’ll see you around lunch then.” He said, rubbing his arm with his free hand and started heading for the check out counter.
"Lord Trazu...a question." She asked suddenly.
"Yes?" He replied, wincing slightly at the sudden formality as he turned to face her.
There was a pause before she continued. "I know you mean well, but why are you so insistent at knowing my past?"
"I didn't realize I was being
that pushy about it." Trazu said, blushing faintly in embarrassment. "I just want to know everything about you."
"Why?"
"I...uh...lets just say I have my own secrets that I know some are not ready to hear."
"There you go again about secrets. I
told you my reasons for not..."
"I know!" Trazu interrupted, a bit louder then he intended and drawing a glare from the library attendant. "'Some secrets are best not revealed.' you said. I understand that and I also understand you are afraid of what would happen to you if that secret is revealed."
"How did you...."
"You adamant refusing to even so much as hint at what it is tells a lot." Trazu explained, a bit more harshly then he intended. "I know from painful personal experience though, that such deeply buried secrets have a very bad habit of becoming revealed at the worse possible times."
"You couldn't possibly understand what this means for me. No one can."
"Do you think just
anyone would understand what it's like not being in control of your own body while it goes out and slaughters people?"
Asri faltered a moment, then retorted. "That's different! I'm the only one going through this, so there's no way you could understand."
"Try me." Trazu said boldly, staring at her in the eyes.
For what felt like an eternity they just stared at each other, until Asri turned her head away. "You don't trust me because of this do you?" She asked.
"I trust you with my life, my children's lives...everything, despite the secrets you hold from me." Trazu said softly. "It's you that can't seem to trust me, or anyone else, not even the Jedi."
Stung, Asri turned her back on him. Trazu walked up beside her and gently took her hand into his. "Asri...I know you are afraid, I understand that. But if you keep locking yourself away like this you'll never see the doors of opportunity I
know are out there for you, open and ready for you to take them. There is so much more you can do with your life if you just open yourself up to them."
"But everything will be taken away from me if the secret becomes known...." Asri said quietly.
"How can you be so sure of that? You're not willing to even take a chance? If there's one thing I know you are not...is a coward." It was he then he decided to take his leave, to leave her with those words to think over and start preparing himself for the journey ahead, including getting in as much training as he could before it started. He could only hope that by the time he came back Asri didn't flat out hate him. Fortunately she apparently didn’t see the argument as a reason not to go shopping for him, as he found his new clothes by his door when he left his room to go to lunch….
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