bash.org quotes. - Rebel Cafe - Forums

1 4:26am 04/09/04

The House Detective

Some funny ones I read today.

* kitten has quit IRC (Killed (NickOP (Kill requested by kittster)))
[BlackAIR] kitten got killed??
[Propagandhi] ALRIGHT, WHO IN HERE IS MASTERBATING!?

[Optical-i] Cool, how was work?
[particle] it was alright
[particle] I had a big bean burrito for lunch before work.
[particle] I was blasting customer service all over the place today

[Foxx] im never fallin in love
[Foxx] i've decided
[FuriousC] you dont choose who you love, love chooses you
[FuriousC] and that little fucking son of a bitch sticks itself to your face like the godless bloodsucking bastards in Alien and refuses to let go until it has drained your soul and left you an empty shell of a human being

crazycougr: saw rick james died?
phaded 001: yup
crazycougr: 'natural causes'
phaded 001: wonder what chappelle is gonna do now
crazycougr: cocaine is natural isnt it?

Trikkz R 4 Kidz: YO
Trikkz R 4 Kidz: WASSUP?
tetsu2051: presumably not your shift key

[chibo] Found something pretty rad. $5 FBI hat purchased at HOPE. Blew past a cop at 85. Looked over at the cop, he read the hat, saluted, and retargeted someone else with the radar gun. Not too bad for $5. Highly recommended.

[Mansion_Maniac] I just realized something
[TheEnforcer] ??
[Phone] ??
[Mansion_Maniac] if you renamed "humans" as "Terrans"; "aliens" as "Zerg"; and "Predators" as "Protoss", the new Aliens vs. Predator movie would totally be a movie adaptation of StarCraft.

[Slime] I saw a headline on the newspaper today: "Horrific Rape in Alley", or something.
[Slime] I was like "Is there any other kind of rape?"
[Slime] "HILARIOUS RAPE AS CLOWN SODOMIZED"

[Echo5ive] I am not a Japanese schoolgirl, so I can’t type 80wpm with my thumbs on a cell phone.

[annillace] we landed in vegas, and the pilot says
[annillace] "those of you needing wheelchair assistance, please remain seated"

Astral Astoria Moderator.

milkshake

2 11:56am 04/09/04

Jedi Masterwan ... ... Shaken, Not Stirred

ROFL

Bananas

Theren Gevel

3 3:53pm 04/09/04

friend of the sleeping pill

Oh my fucking god this shit is hilarious! I've never seen this site before... this is the funniest shit I've ever read in my life. Thank you Kas.

t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us when i say...
BlackAdder> WRONG BTICH
BlackAdder> IM SICK OF YOU
BlackAdder> AND YOUR LAME STORIES
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE THINKS YOURE FUNNY
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR STORIES
BlackAdder> IN FACT
BlackAdder> IF YOU DIED RIGHT NOW
BlackAdder> I DON"T THINK NOBODY WOULD CARE
BlackAdder> SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT FAG
*** t0rbad sets mode: +b BlackAdder*!*@*.*
*** BlackAdder has been kicked my t0rbad ( )
t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
CRCError> right
heartless> Right.
r3v> right

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that fucker.

Theren Gevel

4 4:18pm 04/09/04

friend of the sleeping pill

And one of my friends just told me we actually know t0rbad in real life. Go figure.

Kas

5 4:27pm 04/09/04

Internaut

Yeah, lots of it is pretty funny.

Vega

6 5:22pm 04/09/04

defy the tyrannous stars

[Slime] "HILARIOUS RAPE AS CLOWN SODOMIZED"

LOLOL

I love bash.org

tatclass> YOU ALL SUCK DICK
tatclass> er.
tatclass> hi.
andy\code> A common typo.
tatclass> the keys are like right next to each other.

Zark Ekan

7 6:59pm 04/09/04

assistant regional titus & epic space jesus

(Mootar) morons.
(Mootar) these people who live in my apartment complex are connected to my wireless
(Mootar) they must think they're super-cool hackers by breaking into my completely unsecure network
(Mootar) unfortunatly, the connection works both ways
(Mootar) long story short, they now have loads of horse porn on their computer

Bash.org is awesome.

Master Ahnk

8 7:42pm 04/09/04

Blink If You Can Hear Me

reuben> somebody keeps jiggling the doorknob on my front door, then running away
reuben> i don't know if i should call the police, or hook up some electricity to the doorknob
cristobal> why don't you put ice on the stairs
cristobal> and heat up the door knob
cristobal> and swing paint buckets down from your two story foyer
cristobal> then a few years later, fade from the public eye.....

hilo21) ima looking for a site that seels amp
hilo21) ima looking for a site that seels amps
hilo21) iam looking for a site that seels amps
hilo21) I am looking for a site that sells amps
nexxai) how bout you look for a site that teaches english?
hilo21) fuck you
nexxai) Lemme guess, you'd kick my ass, but can't read the road signs to get to my house?

lol lol lol

Mikkel> If you went camping and you got REALLY drunk with your friend and you
woke up the next morning with a condom stuck up your ass would you tell anybody?
Celestya> i dont think so
Mikkel> Wanna go camping?

lmao

kylev> BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
kylev> hahahahaha
kylev> some girl just came onto our floor
kylev> and was yelling "sexual favors for anyone who does my sociology paper"
kylev> i just asked her what the paper was about
kylev> and she said the accomplishments and growth of feminism
`Neo> bahahahaha

Oh man.

blazemore> LITTLETON, Colo. - Colorado officials plan to try a 15-year-old boy as an adult for allegedly offering a Sony PlayStation to have his aunt killed.
FlipTopBx> is it modded?

*** Quits: TITANIC (Excess Flood)

o_O

WiLdSeXyPrInCeSs> i luv guyz where would they be wifout us gals???
XeNoX> Still in the Garden Of Eden you gullible bitch.

lol

jeebus> the "bishop" came to our church today
jeebus> he was a fucken impostor
jeebus> never once moved diagonally

lmao

Zybl0re> get up
Zybl0re> get on up
Zybl0re> get up
Zybl0re> get on up
phxl|paper> and DANCE
nmp3bot dances :D-<
nmp3bot dances :D|-<
nmp3bot dances :D/-<
[SA]HatfulOfHollow> i'm going to become rich and famous after i invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet

heath> then wouldn't being vegetarian mess up the food chain doing the ecological system harm?
heath> just a thought...
hoemonkey> yeah.....cause then you let the cows think that they're better.. and then the cows will start eating us. good point, heath.

lol

OS: In a world of bon-bons, you are a twinkie.
Ahnk: God damn you, I am Count Chocula and you know it.

I'm not spending my anniversary night thumping my head against the wall. - Damalis, on Moderating TRF
Then tell him you want it harder, damnit! - Ahnk, on Damalis

Zark Ekan

9 7:56pm 04/09/04

assistant regional titus & epic space jesus

Miyomei2: I had my portable CD player, and took it in the bathroom with me while I went to pee.
Miyomei2: And the second I whipped my penis out, the theme song to 'Rocky' started playing.
Miyomei2: I've never felt more manly than in that moment.

lib1790> so, at this college there was an extra credit question "Is hell endothermic or exothermic"
lib1790> this is what one kid wrote:
lib1790> First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass.
If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
lib1790>As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.
lib1790> Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant.
lib1790>So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose (i.e.,Hell is exothermic).
liv1790>Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over (i.e.,Hell is endothermic).
lib1790>So which is it? If we accept the postulate given by Ms.Therese Banyan during my freshman year, "That it will be a cold night in hell before I go out with you," and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having a relationship with her, the second case cannot be true. Therefore, hell is exothermic.
lib1790> the kid was the only one who got credit

Dolash02

10 8:09pm 04/09/04

Return of the King of the Cafe!

Poor guy. Ms. Therese Banyan should go out with him just for being witty.

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